Keepin’ It Real!
Guiding Principles for Using Personal Experiences in Sermons
Chuck Hill, D.Min.
Introduction
One of the most effective ways to connect with people in preaching is through personal stories. When used properly, your experiences can make abstract truths tangible and theological concepts relatable. However, there is a fine line between using personal illustrations effectively and mishandling them in a way that undermines credibility, damages relationships, or distracts from the gospel.
Paul reminds us in 2 Corinthians 4:2, “Rather, we have renounced secret and shameful ways; we do not use deception, nor do we distort the word of God. On the contrary, by setting forth the truth plainly we commend ourselves to everyone’s conscience in the sight of God.” Effective communication requires honesty, humility, and wisdom. Here are five guiding principles to ensure that when you use personal experiences in your preaching, you truly “Keep it real.”
1. Tell the Truth
There is always a temptation to embellish a story to make it more dramatic, humorous, or engaging. However, stretching the truth—even with good intentions—ultimately damages your credibility. The moment someone recognizes that your details do not align with reality, trust is lost.
Proverbs 12:19 says: “Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue lasts only a moment.” (NIV)
This verse highlights the lasting impact of honesty and the fleeting nature of deception. It reinforces the importance of truthfulness, especially in preaching and leadership.
If we cannot be trusted to speak truthfully about personal matters, how can we expect people to trust us when we proclaim the truth of God’s Word? Resist the urge to exaggerate—truth itself is powerful enough.
2. Refuse to Make Yourself the Hero
People connect more with struggles than with successes. When you consistently position yourself as the hero of every story, you subtly create distance between yourself and your listeners. Instead of drawing them in, you push them away.
Jesus modeled humility in Philippians 2:7, “Rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant.” (NIV)
Instead of painting yourself as the victor, focus on moments of failure, growth, and grace. Vulnerability in the pulpit makes you more relatable and allows God’s power (not your achievements), to be the focus.
3. Master Before You Mention
One of the greatest dangers in preaching is speaking on things we have not personally mastered. If we preach about patience but are known for our temper, or speak about generosity while being privately stingy, our words will ring hollow.
James warns in James 3:1, “Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly.” (NIV)
Before using an personal experience as an example, ask yourself if you have truly lived out what you are preaching. Integrity matters — always!
4. Put Others First
Most personal stories involve others—our spouses, children, parents, friends, or coworkers. Before sharing, consider whether telling the story could cause harm, embarrassment, or unintended consequences.
Proverbs 11:13 says, “A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.” (NIV)
Our role as preachers is not to expose or embarrass but to uplift and encourage. Always protect the vulnerable. If a story puts someone else in a negative light, leave it out or reshape the way you tell it to always put them first, keeping their reputation and dignity in mind.
5. Ask Before Assuming
For pastors with families, especially those in leadership roles, it is vital to safeguard relationships by seeking permission before sharing personal stories. Just because a story is meaningful to you does not mean it is appropriate to tell publicly.
Ephesians 4:29 instructs, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” (NIV)
Always ask before assuming—especially when it involves a family member, friend, or someone close to you. Asking preserves trust and has the potential to strengthen relationships.
Conclusion
Preaching is a sacred responsibility, and the way we use personal stories within our sermons can either strengthen or weaken our message. By committing to truthfulness, humility, integrity, sensitivity, and relational wisdom, we ensure that our storytelling enhances, rather than detracts from, the gospel message.
In the end, “keepin’ it real” is about more than just being authentic—it’s about being trustworthy, Christ-centered, and wise in how we communicate God’s truth. Keep preaching. Illustrate with intentionality. And always let your stories reflect God’s glory, not just your journey.